ROH Review 03/10/12

“Du Burns Arena.   Day 117.  I remember my family.  They were good people.  I miss them terribly.  There were rumors going around today that we would be allowed to leave soon…….I like to think those rumors are true, but I just can’t allow myself to believe that.  The ring rats are starting to look appealing.  I wish I could see the sun one last time.”

Cold open to a recap of Edwards/Strong from last week.  Great match, if a completely overbooked and wonky ending.  To sum it up, Strong cheated, but the referee didn’t see it and counted the pin.  A second referee comes out and somehow restarts the match, Edwards wins.  Cornette says Richards will defend against Edwards AND Strong on March 30^th.  There, we are all caught up with that.

Nigel and Kevin are in the ring.  It must be REALLY annoying to have to do this 10 times in one night.  They talk about the triple threat match on March 30^th, the first day of Showdown in the Sun.  ROH has decided that they are going to have a title match both nights, so they come up with the Blind Destiny Challenge.  Sounds like something I can get behind.  Jimmy Cornette is going to explain.

Essentially, they want two title matches, but they don’t know who is going to win the match Friday night (wink wink).  So, here’s the gist.  Edwards, Strong and Richards will all have singles matches on Saturday.  Whoever wins the triple threat match on Friday night; their match becomes a title defense.  So tonight, we have three matches to determine their opponents.  The three matches tonight are Adam Cole vs. Kevin Steen, winner faces Eddie Edwards.  Kyle O’Reily vs. Michael Elgin, winner faces Davey Richards and Jay Lethal vs. Kenny King, winner faces Roderick Strong.  This seems convoluted, but once you think about the logic, it is a REALLY good idea.  An idea I have ZERO faith in TNA or WWE being able to pull off.  This requires some actual pre-planning, and neither of the other companies seem too keen on doing that.

COMMERCIALS!

-Kevin talks to the All Night Express about their match against the Young Bucks, two matches in two nights.  Kind of gives away the Lethal/King match doesn’t it?  I mean I GUESS King could pull double duty, but that seems unlikely.  I would have picked someone else to face Lethal.  I kind of like King, but Rhett Titus just sounds goofy.  Tornado match and a no DQ street fight.  Should be a good couple of matches

-For some reason Kenny King comes back and talks about the match tonight against Jay Lethal.  King things his destiny is to win the ROH world title.  Aiming things a little high there aren’t you Kenny?

-Lethal kind of has a heel vibe saying he deserves the shot at the title.  Lethal wants the world title, even though he admits he failed a few weeks ago…….though there WERE about twenty men at ringside having a riot.  I wonder if that number will grow?  In a few weeks it could be SEVENTY men having a CAGE MATCH at ringside.  That would be fun.

KENNY KING vs. JAY LETHAL – Blind Destiny Match 1

Winner faces Roderick Strong.  Lethal tries to attack at the bell, and Nigel correctly calls it “shades of Randy Savage”.  Seriously, Lethal DOES have Savage’s mannerisms down to perfection.  Rhett Titus is at ringside with King, and Roderick Strong and Truth Martini come out to the top of the ramp (which, since this is ROH is only about 20 feet from the ring, if that).  I do kind of hate how Lethal calls for the LETHAL INJECTION before his move.  Seems silly to telegraph the move.  Same thing when HBK would stomp the mat for an hour and a half before he hit Sweet Chin Music.  Lethal gets the win with a nice bridging pin.  Not the best match I have ever seen, but certainly not terrible either.

-Adam Cole is geeked to be in this match.  Just months ago he was teaming with that schmuck Kyle O’Reiley, now he has main evented New York, and he faces Kevin Steen.  Wow! Good Gosh!

-Steen wants to smash Adam’s cute little face.  He wants to win the ROH title so Jim Cornette loses his fucking mind.  How many times do I have to say I love Kevin Steen?

KEVIN STEEN vs. ADAM COLE – Blind Destiny Match 2

Winner faces Eddie Edwards.  Adam Cole would be very excited to face his tag team partner.  I don’t like your chances Adam.  Kevin Kelly reminds us that Steen has the height and weight advantage, but you can’t measure heart.  Well, you might be able to measure Cole’s heart when Steen rips it out of his chest.  Steen chops the SHIT out of Cole, and then tells the camera “that was a good one! Kind of hurt my hand.”  Again, the love, it is strong.  The crowd is not behind Cole at all, they are chanting for Steen to piledrive him.  This is what happens when you hold a crowd hostage for a month.  Steen does a rolling senton into the corner; it seriously looks like it kills Cole.  That was after a DDT from the outside to the inside.  This review sounds one sided, Cole is getting some moves in, but Steen takes everything he throws at him.  Steen kills him with a powerbomb, then a clothesline from hell, and finally an F-6 or whatever he is calling it.  It wasn’t quite a squash, but Steen dominated.  Steen faces Eddie Edwards on the 31^st.  After the match, Steen wants to beat up Cole some more and tries a package piledriver, but Eddie Edwards meddles in Steen’s business.

INSIDE RING OF HONOR!

-Kevin Kelly pimps the 16 match Showdown in the Sun.

-Roderick Strong doesn’t like the triple threat match at all.

-Eddie Edwards doesn’t like the triple threat match at all.

-Lace Storm is coming out of retirement to face Michael Bennett.  Dear ROH, it hasn’t worked for Jericho, it is not going to work for Lance Storm either

-Bennett is going to send Storm home early enough so he can still catch the early bird special.  Oh, and OH MY GOD MARIA IS HOT

-The Briscoes face WGTT for the tag titles.  I hope the Briscoes retain in this one, they probably should, though I could see WGTT embracing their heel turn and cheating to win them back.  They recap the feud, the Briscoes winning the titles, Shelton getting suspended, Jay getting handcuffed, Mark running into chairs and Haas shelling out ten grand to pay the fines (it would have been interesting to have HOT win that match against the Briscoes and loan them the ten grand to pay the fines.)

COMMERCIAL!

-Young Bucks really sicken Kevin Kelly.  The Young Bucks call the ANX dorks.  Well THAT will rile them up.  Gotta say though, I don’t hate the Young Bucks

KYLE O’REILY vs. MICHAEL ELGIN – Blind Destiny Match 3

Davey Richards joins Nigel and Kevin on commentary.  But first, they talk to Kyle.  Kyle will totally do things differently than Eddie if he beats Elgin.  He will TOTALLY do it with honor and he and Davey will stay best buds.  Truth puts Kyle’s mind at ease and says Elgin is going to kill him, so it’s all good.  Davey puts Eglin over pretty nicely, really pimping his strength.  They did have a nice match a few months ago.  Richards is NOT a fan of Steen however.  Calls him a joke.  I really hope Steen takes the title from Davey, I have a feeling they will slow burn that all the way through to the end of the year though, just seems to make sense.  Roderick Strong is back out to the ring, Davey is not happy about it, and calls bullshit.  Literally.  Davey has a potty mouth.  O’Reilly hits a belly to back suplex from the apron to the floor, looked like Elgin smacked the back of his head on the guardrail, but he didn’t stay down.  Elgin does have some stupid strength.  O’Reilly tries for the guillotine choke, but Elgin powers out of it into a HELLEVATOR.  I love watching Elgin toss people around.  Regalplex into a crippler crossface by O’Reilly, very nice sequence.  No mention of Benoit though.  Roddy interferes again and Richards has had enough.  Elgin attacks from behind and hits a sick Buckle Bomb, then a sit out powerbomb and gets the win.  Elgin gets a rematch against Richards on the 31^st.  Nice match here too.

Three really good matches this week.  Nothing announced for next week.  I assume the siege situation continues for another week.  The arena must be getting low on nachos and mountain dew.  Things could turn ugly….tune in next week!

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